Remember when you were a kid, and your parents would go on vacation, leaving you with your grandparents? They would shove you and your sibling in that small room with the side-by-side twin beds and matching decor that hasn't been updated in years. 

Often, that decor would match the rest of the house perfectly. This place is a little like that. 

Except, instead of featuring decor from the 70s, it seems to have been decorated by Cruella de Vil. 

The black, red and zebra print decor is a lot to take in. Even the plunger is black and red. It's honestly impressive. But, if you rent this place, you have to live with the Moulin Rouge decor, because it's furnished. It's a nightmare. It also means you can't even add a Bob Marley poster if you wanted, because you know they'd probably refuse to give your deposit back if they ever found out. 

But decor aside, the listing reads: “SEEKING TWO STUDENTS TO SHARE RENT AT $650/MONTH PER STUDENT" in all capitals. The whole listing is in all caps, so all the requirements read like they’re being shouted at you.

Now that’s a decent deal on rent, since you also get cable, utilities and internet included… Except for the small fact that you have to share the room and sleep in a twin bed… two feet away from your roommate …  Take a moment and let that sink in. Two. Feet. Away.

Not only are the beds identical, but so are the desk chairs. They give me weird The Shining twins vibes for some reason. Do you guys get that? No? Just me?  

Also, there’s only one desk… I guess you can fight over who gets to study there. At least with a dorm room you each get your own desk.

As for the rest of the apartment, it’s no worse than a dorm hall.  

The weird thing is for how insistent this landlord is on getting students, it’s such a transit dead zone. I mean yeah there’s the Keele bus, but it doesn’t even stop at York anymore.

If you want to get to another campus, it’s a 15 - 20 minute bus ride to the nearest subway stop. You’re never going to make it to an 8 a.m. class if you live here!  

Specs

• Address: somewhere near Keele and Eglinton
• Type: Basement
• Rent: $1,300/ month
• Furnished? Yes
• Utilities: Yes
• Air conditioning? No
• Bedrooms: 1
• Bathrooms: 1
• Parking: Street
• Laundry? Laundromat is a 3-minute walk
• Outdoor space? No
• Pet friendly? “ABSOLUTELY NO PETS”

Good For

Knowing your roommate “intimately.”  

Move On If

Cruella de Vil gave you nightmares as a child.