Photo: "A handful of hope" by bigdaddyhame, member of the blogTO Flickr pool.

Your Toronto morning news roundup for Friday September 12th, 2008:

The Canadian dollar hit a 13-month low, and gas prices went up 13 cents overnight to their highest ever in the GTA. And in other related news: Harper ate 13 kittens, Dion can't pronounce the word "thirteen" en anglais, Layton hasn't shaved in 13 hundred years, and Duceppe thinks it's funny that Dion can't pronounce the word "thirteen" en anglais. I was going to comment on May but Harper and Layton won't eat kittens and try to speak English if I bring May into this.

While many bridezillas dream of beachfront weddings and painstakingly work with chefs to create a memorable, delicious meal for the reception, one idiotic California couple came all the way to Toronto to be wed at a KFC and eat shitty, soy-based chicken-analog sandwiches. How much they were paid to pull this stunt (if they were) is not mentioned in the press release.

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A 58-year old Mississauga grandfather was kidnapped and held captive for ransom for 3 days before apparently being released some 30km away from his home. Four people have been arrested and a fifth is being sought, and police say that no money was sent their way. Clearly this kidnap crew is made up of amateurs.

The question of drug and alcohol testing for TTC employees will be back in the spotlight today, when the commission unveils proposed new rules. Union boss Bob Kinnear is "going to take this one to the wall" so beware.

In related news, a right-wing think tank says that making the TTC an essential service would cost $6million per year. My think tank says that's a price worth paying (because that's equivalent to the cost of just 3 days worth of striking per year).